I shall not die of a cold. I shall die of having lived. ~Willa Cather
recently, my family suffered a great loss. the death of my granny was a blow to most who knew her, especially family & close friends. though she had been having health problems in the past year, she seemed to bounce back, as is (was) her nature. she was a tough broad & she fought until she was just too tired to fight anymore. at 88 years old, she was ready for her next act. i was privileged to sit with her in her final days and talk to her without any back talk (i guarantee you, that was a first).
she was an amazing person who lived for her family and loved fiercely. there was never a question of who was in charge...she was the shot caller, the ball buster, and the person who told you things that you might not want to hear. I disagreed with her a lot, but i'm not saying she wasn't right a lot of the time. she spoke her mind, whether or not you wanted to hear it. it's who she was & she made no apologies about it.
in the days following the loss, my grief has led to a focus on my grandfather. At 88, with health issues of his own, my grief has shifted to worry as i think about the days ahead and how they will look for him, without his mate of 70 plus years. to say that it breaks my heart would not begin to describe the feelings i have. their life together was full and perfectly imperfect. they celebrated great highs and devastating lows. they were steadfast in their love of one another and of their family. to be part of the life they made is a privilege.
